I want my baby back!!
I'm on his laptop right now and there's no two-finger scroll on the touchpad, I can't use cmd/[ to go back a page, when I hold down the mouse button there's a 50/50 chance that it's actually the right mouse button, I don't have tabbed browsing. It's just not right!! I like using my computer with all the buttons and keys set up the way I like. I want MY internets back!!!

Comedy can be cruel...
That made me laugh out loud, it did. My cow-orker even commented, "Somebody's having too much fun!"
Re: Comedy can be cruel...
On my Mac it doesn't matter if I use my right thumb or my left. There's just one button. If I want to get the contextual menu I don't need a mouse button that's useless most of the time, I just need to hold down the control key when I click.
I want my internets back on my mac!!!!!